NORMALLY, Christmas doesn't really stress me out. I enjoy it. Go with the flow and everything will work out. Besides, it's suppose to be a spiritual filled time and who can feel the spirit when they're pullin' their hair out and their eyeballs are poppin out of their head???? NO one... I mean come on really?
THis year, however, Christmas seems to have snuck up out of no where! I cannot believe there are only 14 days left... that's two weeks!!! In other words, projects are pilin' up and all I can do is grieve and curse technology. That's right. I ordered fabric online thinking it'd be better that way. After 1 1/2 weeks, they haven't even finished processing & shipped it yet! I didn't order that much. REALLY! I'm very agitated about that too cause I gave them my school address for shipping. And after tomorrow I can't be in my dorm anymore so I'll be at home. Which means I'll have to drive an hour just to check my po box to see if it came... :-( Not happy! at all!
On top of that... It's pouring today. & it's cold! so I had to walk across campus to check the box in the rain... before I realized I could check the status online... and then unhappy that it wasn't here... i walked back across campus in the rain... soaked. ONce again... NOT happy!
On top of that, I tried to do the printing part of one of my projects... and now my printer won't feed paper. Who knows y!?! It just won't. It hates me. I'm hurt by it's betrayal. I want to smash it on the tile floor into a billion pieces to show it how it pains me. But that won't solve anything, so I resist temptation. Stupid printer.
So I tried to finish the RS newsletter that I'd forgotten to do for this month. It's done... except there's a line in the wrong place and dumb microsoft word won't let me drag it out of the way. :-P ... seriously... is this gang up on may day?
I thought I was gonna hang out with some friends today. But they never called, or text, or anything. So except for goin' to take my acct final at 8am this mornin' & then walkin' to the mailbox in the pooring rain & back... I haven't left my room. Yeah... these walls excite me... not.... I'm feeling claustophobic, alone, and hated by technology. Stupid technology.
The only thing mom could say was that it might snow. Thanks mom. That's exactly what I need. It'll solve all my problems. It'll (NOT) make my package here faster. It'll make it even colder. It'll make the wet curvy roads outside between here & anywhere icy. It'll make carrying my things that I need over Christmas break to the car a wet, cold, slippery trip after trip after trip. Yeah, I can't wait. Bring on the snow. Maybe it'll bury me alive and I'll die asleep in a cold snowbank... ok not really since I'm inside... but just a thought. a bad one. i'm sry. It's just not been a good day. I'm mad. I just want my things to work the way they're suppose to so I can finish my projects. I was so excited about Christmas. Now I have nothing. And not only that but I have to figure out how to pay for school next semester and hold all my other wishes and dreams together. I don't like the big world. Won't some masculine prince come rescue me and protect me from the evil world and take care of me for the rest of my life so we can live happily ever after?
...
well it was worth a try. Besides, my prince probably doesn't even know I exist. Or he's so busy looking for world peace he hasn't had time to settle down. Or maybe he's fighting a dragon up in the mountains and can't come find me cause he's saving all those other people. who knows.... but i wait. and I try to busy myself in the meantime. I try to be noteworthy and noticeable. Perhaps my crafts and cookies will work their way into someone's heart someday. After all, the best way to a man's heart's through his stomach right?
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